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10 Mistakes Couples Make When Investing in First Dance Choreography – And, What to Do Instead!

Are you thinking about investing in First Dance Choreography for your big day?

Great choice! First Dance Choreography is the BIGGEST detail that most couples will forget about in the hustle and bustle of planning a wedding – you don’t want to be caught like a deer in the headlights on the dance floor!

Lucky for you, we’ve served hundreds of couples by helping them craft the perfect first dance. In that time, we’ve helped our clients avoid common pitfalls couples face when investing in choreography. Based on our experience, we’ll share ten of the most common mistakes couples make – and what to do instead!

#1: Thinking they have to be a professional dancer

Many couples hesitate to invest in first dance choreography because they are afraid they won’t be able to learn the choreography or they fear embarrassing themselves in front of their friends and family.

But looking like professional dancers is NOT the purpose of your first dance. The purpose of your first dance is to express your love story through movement. Dance brings us together!

Whether you want a DWTS-level showstopping routine or something simple and intimate that feels like “you,” there’s nothing you can’t do with a bit of practice and a little coaching! For example, Danse L’Amour designs every class with beginners in mind. With our support, we’re confident that you’ll feel confident in your dance skills and hope that your photographer will capture those smooth moves that you’ll remember for a lifetime!

Our clients walk away with newfound confidence in their dance skills, a personal transformation, and a special memory they’ll keep forever. But don’t take it from us – read what Danse L’Amour clients are saying here!

What To Do Instead: Let go of rigid expectations and allow your dance coach to support you!

#2: Thinking that choreographed first dances are tacky, cringe-worthy, or out of style.

We’ll have to disagree on this one! We’ve all seen those videos on YouTube or TikTok of “fails” during a couple’s first dance. You don’t want to end up like them and embarrass yourself!

But, the alternative for most couples? Standing and swaying for 3+ minutes as your guests wonder when dinner will be served. While there’s nothing wrong with staying true to who you are as a couple, this just isn’t enough for many couples!

The truth is, the only time your first dance could be “embarrassing” is if you do choreography that doesn’t feel authentically you. If you try to recreate a famous or popular dance without considering your personality, this may strike some as inauthentic or forced.

What To Do Instead: Find an instructor that considers your personality and story when choreographing your first dance. Remember that you don’t necessarily have to have a flashy musical dance number! You can learn a particular dance style, like the foxy or the rumba, to spice it up beyond the “step and sway” that most couples use during their first dance.

#3: Bringing a TikTok, YouTube video, or a famous partner dance to show the instructor and saying, "I want this exactly."

Have you brought a photo to a hairstylist, instructed them to follow it, and been disappointed because it didn’t look like the photos? More often than not, this disappointment comes from not trusting the hairstylist’s professional opinion. Suppose a color isn’t possible to achieve in one session or a specific tone doesn’t match your natural color or skin tone. In that case, your hairstylist may use their professional judgment to make adjustments.

So, what does hair have to do with your first dance?

Well, the same is often true with your first dance! Every couple is different. Every couple has a different skill level and personality. When you go to your first dance lesson expecting to look exactly like another couple in a video, you’re trying to mold your dance to fit another couple’s personality. These expectations can lead to your dance feeling forced or inauthentic.

While we can pull certain elements or inspiration from a video, a good choreographer will use their professional judgment to help you look your best!

What To Do Instead: Allow your instructor to use their professional judgment to help you look your best on the floor. While you should always speak up if you’re uncomfortable or feel that something isn’t working for you, let go of rigid expectations that will prevent you from letting go and having fun!

#4: Forgetting to think about dress styles, venue size, or other logistics

While we always want our clients to feel confident and supported, regardless of their dress style or venue size, there are certain factors that a choreographer will need to consider!

For example, you don’t want to practice a wide, leaping lift and then not be able to do it on your big day because of your dress or a smaller dance floor. Communicating these logistics with your choreographer will help them create a sequence that showcases your dress and is appropriate for your venue.

What To Do Instead: Before booking your dance lessons, book your venue and purchase your attire, or at the very least, have a solid idea of what you will have. Make sure to communicate these logistics with your instructor as soon as possible so they can make any necessary adjustments.

#5: Not practicing ahead of time in wedding shoes

So, you’ve picked out the perfect pair of shoes for your wedding day, only to get on the dance floor and stumble over them the entire song! A wardrobe malfunction is every bride’s worst nightmare.

While most brides don’t want their groom to see their dress ahead, we still encourage clients to practice in their shoes and a long dress at least a few weeks before the big day. We also encourage brides to put on their dress privately to practice and see how it moves.

What To Do Instead: Bring your shoes to dance practice as soon as you have them, and try to practice privately in your wedding dress at least a few weeks before the big day.

#6: Choosing a song, style, or movement because it's "trendy" and not because it represents them as a couple

It’s easy to get wrapped up in Pinterest boards and wedding trend blog posts when planning your wedding. Brides that followed the trends back in 2012 may wish they had a do-over in 2023! While there’s nothing wrong with showcasing your personality at your wedding, and in fact, you should, following a trend often accomplishes the opposite.

Your first dance number is no exception! The best first dances are set to a song that’s special to the two of you, whether it’s the “trendy” choice or not. We’d recommend selecting personal favorites or timeless classics that feel authentic to your story.

What to Do Instead: Choose a song that is personal to you as a couple or a timeless classic that you’ll still love in 10, 25, and 50 years! Remember, whenever you hear this song in the future, you’ll think of that special moment on the dance floor on your wedding day. Trends are fleeting, but your marriage & your memories are forever!

#7: Focusing too much on perfection and forgetting to have fun

Here’s the most important tip for any couple: Have fun! The couples that let go of perfection on the dance floor and look up from their feet into their partner’s eyes are the couples that walk away with the most beautiful photos and the most unforgettable memories. While we want you to look your best, we believe that dance, above all, should be FUN!

What to Do Instead: Early in the process, get out of the habit of looking down at your feet. Let mistakes happen, and focus on being in the moment with your partner! Read more on the blog for our expert tips for confidence on the dance floor – even for beginners!

#8: Not implementing a practice schedule/not making date night out of it

While your instructor certainly isn’t a drill sergeant, we encourage our clients to practice at home often! Prioritizing independent practice will ensure that you’re not scrambling for your dance to come together at the last minute.

The best way to do this is to make a date night out of it! If practicing feels like a chore or another task to check off the wedding prep list, you’ll be less inclined to do it independently. But, if you can reframe practices into fun date nights that will help you bond as an engaged couple, you’ll be looking forward to it all week long!

What To Do Instead: Crack open the wine, turn on the mood lighting, and make a date night out of choreography practice! Whether you're joining us in the studio or taking virtual lessons from home, every couple will love this beautiful opportunity to come together for an active date night.

#9: Choosing the wrong instructor

Just like dating, there are some red flags you’ll need to watch out for when choosing a first dance choreographer!

If your choreographer seems to teach a standardized set of choreography to every couple, you may want to steer clear, as your dance likely won’t be the personal and intimate touch you want for your big day. Or, if your choreographer doesn’t try to make things fun or expects professional dance skills, this is a negative energy you don’t want to be around during your wedding planning!

Luckily for you, all instructors at Danse L’Amour are beginner-focused, fun, and knowledgeable! Just like you and your spouse, you’ll find your perfect match with us.

What to Do Instead: Read testimonials and reviews from your instructor’s past clients, ask lots of questions about their processes and philosophy during onboarding, and make sure you feel comfortable with them right off the bat!

#10: Not investing in first dance choreography at all!

That’s right! The first dance is a HUGE detail that many couples don’t think about until they’re awkwardly step-and-swaying on the dance floor. But your first dance is arguably one of the most memorable times of the night. It’s the one time during your reception that everyone’s attention will be turned directly to you and your spouse. During your ceremony, it’s harder to show your personality and have fun. A choreographed first dance will set the tone for the rest of the night and get everyone on the dance floor to join you!

You’ve invested in the flowers, place settings, food, and ALL the small details to make your day successful. Why would you leave out one BIG detail that everyone will notice?

What To Do Instead: Book your first session with Danse L’Amour TODAY!

First Dance Choreography has one of the highest returns on investment for your wedding day. You’ll one day forget about the table centerpieces, the flowers, and the favors, even though it seems like a big deal in the planning process. But you’ll remember your first dance for a lifetime. You’ll show your children and grandchildren the images of you and your spouse having the time of your life on the dance floor. With a bit of coaching and a little practice, you’ll have the opportunity for this priceless moment you’ll cherish forever.

Head over to our Services page to see the options available to you. We have locations in Georgia and Tennessee and virtual options to serve you anywhere in the world! On a tight budget? You can still nail your number with our Wedding Dance E-Courses!

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